Mayor Alvin Brown Shaved Off His Mustache Because He Thought It Made Him Look Gay

It has recently been made known to this reporter that Jacksonville Mayor Alvin Brown used to have a mustache as recently as 2006, but in an attempt to never look gay shaved it off. These recently leaked photos of the mayor confirm that Mayor Brown used to actually have a mustache but then became concerned of the risk of perhaps appearing gay, an assumption he could not stand.

Mr. Brown, an outspoken critic of the “gay agenda” was recently, as recent as 2007, seen playing tennis, a known athletic recruitment arena of the gay agenda, and wearing a black mustache, which was recently shaved in an attempt to cement a hetero-elite ranking and victory in the polls.

More details to follow as they happen. Stay tuned.

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