CDC Names Jacksonville’s Riverside Neighborhood “Ground Zero” for the HPV Virus


Riverside, Jacksonville, FL –

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released a report this morning naming Jacksonville’s historic Riverside neighborhood as the global epicenter for the Human papillomavirus or HPV. The report makes use of cutting edge disease tracking and computer modeling technology to accurately pinpoint the growth and source of the sexually-transmitted disease. With unbelieveable precision, the new technology actually pinpointed the HPV ground-zero to an upstairs apartment on Forbes Street once shared by a local “indie-dance” DJ and several artists.


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13 thoughts on “CDC Names Jacksonville’s Riverside Neighborhood “Ground Zero” for the HPV Virus

  1. Mandie Dean says:

    I just literally was talking about hipsters….except I referenced the claps come back. #thanksdirtyhipsters

  2. willow says:

    There is no evidence anywhere else as to where you got this information from. Sounds like a woman scorned to me. I am a bit curious as to who this dj is, and why you feel the need to slander, said person, on the internet. Seems childish, and a bit pathetic to me.

    • lu says:

      willow: are you familiar with the concept of satire? no names are named too, which makes me confused as to why you have such a big problem with a specific person being slandered when no specific person is named. get off your high horse, it seems like its just a joke.

      • willow says:

        I’m not on a “high horse”, but I feel that bullying at any level is pathetic, like little pathetic gg down there. I’m sure that someone that is close to the person that this post is about would be smart enough to link the clues. Figures that none of you would use your real names. Besides this post make jacksonville look disgusting. It effects everyone that lives here

  3. gg riverside says:

    Willow obv has HPV..

    • willow says:

      Oh how clever. That I don’t agree with a bogus post that I “obv have hpv”. You just sound ignorant as hell. How long did it take you to come up with that one?

    • willow says:

      Also, did you know that I could have your ip traced? Technically I could sue you for posting this on the internet. 🙂 & I think I will.

      • cyborg_man says:

        Willow, I’ve traced your IP and I see that you’re posting from a known pedophile’s house. Cops at your location soon.

    • willow says:

      Haha cyborg_man. That is the funniest shit I’ve read all day.

  4. Erin says:

    LOL It’s a joke folks.

  5. cyborg_man says:

    Probably cause of all the queers.

  6. james says:

    willow, quit being a fucking jagoff

  7. J Cheese says:

    So much HPV I can feel it dripping down the back of my throat.

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